10 out of 10 people die

Jan 30, 2016...

I'm feeling very pensive right now....

Only 1 flight left. Tons of People have been praying for my family and me and I have been so blessed by that. I haven't had a lot to say lately, but I feel I'm ready to share this....

"10 out of 10 people die." A saying Pastor Brett from my home church uses a lot. (A meadorism as we call them at ACCF) Death is just as much apart of life as living or being born is. Life sometimes feels like nothing more than a series of losses. Occasionally, being so focused on the losses you miss all the blessings. Death is an absolute certainty. When it comes varies, how it comes varies and who it affects varies. Being the one left behind is hard and everyone grieves differently, but I think how you respond to that loss matters. How you continue to live your life matters, because God isn't done with you yet, infact Moses was 80 before he really begun his work for God. 

People love to tell you "You’ll get over it…” It’s clichés like that, that cause grieving people hardship. You just lost someone you love. Now your life is forever different from what you thought it would be. You make plans with them, have dreams for them, you pray and hope for them. You never fully get over it because 'it' is a person you loved. The sharp pain dulls to an ache, new people fill your life, but the gap they left can never be filled. Because the hole in my heart is in the shape of an adorable sweet little 4 year old and no one else will ever be her or fill her place. And why would I want them to? That was perfectly her place in my heart. 

I don't know how to explain my feelings when people ask "how are you?" I have no response usually, I just smile and shrug. But they are sad for me so I chose to show them I'm ok, instead of being the blubbery mess I could be. The truth is, the only honest response I can give you is I'm moving forward. I'm trying not to dwell in the past, but I'm living with the life I've been given. I'm oh so blessed and thankful for the short time I was given with my beautiful sweet niece. There are days that are going to be hard and there are days that are going to be easier. Doesn't mean she's forgotten, just means I know she's safe in the Father's arms. I will see her again in Heaven. On that day, hugs, giggles and love will fill the house of the Lord and I will never lose her again.  

Save me a seat, Rissa-Roo and I'll see you in the Lord's timing. Until then I'm going to do my best to make the most of my time here on Earth. 😘