04 April 2011

Life continues on... Hard to believe I've finally made it to Texas. There are days I just wake up and my first thought is "Oh my word, I'm in Texas." I have to admit their state pride and nation pride is very overwhelming yet very infectious. I find myself wanting to own cowboy boots and a large diesel truck... will that happen probably not, but I'm still considering the boots. ;) The Lord has been working hard in my life. I am definitely feeling a lot like David in the book of Psalms when he continuously is going through emotional ups and downs in life. Some days I feel very bipolar. The Lord keeps me grounded and it is his Love and grace that lets me know that nothing can go wrong because he has me in his hands. I'm daily if not maybe even hourly reminding myself that the Lord has control and that perhaps others and watching me in my struggle to try to get control of my life. Its then that I realize I never had control of my life. The Lord has it all planned out and everything in my life will work together for good, because God has a bigger and better plan than I could ever imagine. I can completely understand the feelings of the Israelites when they were leaving Egypt, they felt they were happier where they were, because they had become content and had forgotten how much they had suffered there. And though they had not yet arrived to the land of milk and honey they were on their way.

On Friday, I think I had my first major crisis of financial instability. Though, I know in my heart that I am where the Lord wants me to be I crave to be back at home, without the idea of rent and bills and loans looming over my head without the comfort of living in my parents home. Though I was not enslaved while living at home I was not yet reaching my full potential as a nurse and as a young adult. I had become content and comfortable in my life and the Lord shot me out of my comfort zone. Searching for a place to call home to dig into the word has also been a recent struggle of mine. Please pray that I continue to lean on the Lord during my time of financial uncertainty and that I trust more in him than in my own strength. Peace be with you.